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Sunday, March 2, 2008

Hurt

I have a lot of pain inside of me. I guess the grieving process has started tonight. I'm so lonely in more ways than one. One of my best friends in the entire world is states away and I have no idea when the next I will see him. My grandpa with whom I was very close recently died and I am starting to realize that I am feeling lonely because I am alone in more ways than one.

I have a lot of thinking to do. A lot of reevaluation. I'm confused about certain attributes about me that have been added and subtracted over time. I need to sit and think long and hard about the person I am. Is this who I truly am? Or am I taking easier steps to making only simple things happen.

I think I might have a broken heart, but I have nothing or no one to show for it.

I once read a quote that said, "frustration is often confused with love". I think this speaks to me so deeply and I am a part of those few who confuse the two.

I need the breath of fresh air of a new city a new place and new faces.